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Day 1: IAD—LHR—Waterloo, London

Well, we are finally on our way back to the UK as a family! I love to early for a flight as I enjoy the Virgin 1st Class Clubhouse. Yes, I am a bougie snob but I’m also adorable. Unfortunately, the check-in desk for our flight didn’t open until 6:55 and we arrived at 5:45 and I should also mention I am the only member of the Family Koog that is flying Virgin Upper Class. Before I am judged let me explain. I offered, nee, begged Mrs. Koog to join me in my lay-flat-bed-and-free-pajama-oasis but she refused. I told her that while I respected her decision to go economy with the kids, I should not be punished for her poor choices, so 3 economy seats and 1 upper class for the Koog Family on this trip.

Anyway, we waited our hour in line and enjoyed watching the passengers for Qatar Airlines come though the line with countless bags, boxes, suitcases and laundry baskets (no joke). I loved seeing the multigenerational families traveling together. Especially the little kids and grandparents. I didn’t travel much with my grandmother due to not having any money but I bet we would have been great travel companions. Although, she probably would have wanted to fly coach, too!

So, we get through check-in and TSA in record time and we arrive at the Upper Class Clubhouse. My plan was this, first be charming (that was easy). Then, use said charm to convince the Upper Class Lounge overlords to allow my family in on the following 2 technicalities:

1. Every Upper Class ticket holder gets one guest free.
2. I am also an Amex Platinum Priority something person that gets myself plus 2 guests free at participating airport 1st class lounges, this get me myself and 2 guests.

Well, none of that worked so instead of having to make Sophie’s choice between Mrs. Koog, B-Koog and E-Koog, I threw the decision to them and the three of them chose Evan to accompany me into the all you can eat space. Probably a wise decision considering his appetite.

Just as E and I were ordering our bevys and apps, the manager came over and asked me if I wanted to pay for the remainder of my family to enter. Of course I said yes. So, in addition to my charm and good looks, they took my credit card and I paid for the 4 of us to enjoy and eat. They definitely lost money on E and B. I believe the consumption tally was something like:

- 2 Venison burgers, 4 bowls of banana pudding ice cream, 1 bowl of cherry sorbet and 5 cokes for E.
- Chicken Tikka Masala, 2 shrimp garden rolls, 3 pots of raspberry tea and a Ploughman’s basket of cheeses, meats, fruit and chutney.

Mrs. Koog and I limited ourselves to one plate of dinner and one bowl of ice cream. After all, we didn’t want to get kicked-out of the place!

Finally, after eating the Upper Class lounge of their inventory, our flight was ready to board. I said a quick good-bye to my loves and headed to the priority boarding line, crossed the threshold of the plane, found my sleeping cocoon, grabbed my orange juice and Champagne, took my seat and exhaled. Vacation is *finally* starting.

I skipped the dinner service because our flight was 10:55pm and I just wanted to sleep. The lovely flight attendant gave me the free jammies (my absolute favorites) and she made up my bed while I changed in the bathroom. As I waited in line for the loo, there was a mom and a baby/toddler, probably not even a year old that was waiting in like for a free stall. I was appalled that the 3 people in front of me, all needing to change into their free pjs didn’t give this woman and the baby the option to go ahead of them in the line. Remembering the days Mrs. Koog and I would wait with a fussy babies, I let the tired mom and baby take my turn. I was “delayed” less than 5 minutes and I think it may have helped the lady keep her sanity. Be polite people.

After my good deeding and changing into my pjs, I was off to sleep. To guarantee sleep, I took 3 Dramamine. (I did consult my friend L to confirm that 3 Dramamine with my other prescription drugs would not kill me. She was correct, I lived.) That did the trick! I Didn’t know anything or anyone until the lovely flight attendant woke me for breakfast. After eating, I changed into my clothes, stowed my PJs and immediately fell asleep when the flight attendant finished un-making the bed. I was sleeping so soundly, I didn’t realize we came within 20 feet of the ground and then aborted the landing. As many of you know, I’m not a great flyer. The idea that I slept through this situation is an absolute miracle for those around me that would have been subjected to my screams and howling.

Deplaning, collecting bags and getting a taxi were pretty uneventful. We grabbed a black cab and headed to the Union Jack Club at Waterloo Station. All of us were dead asleep the entire way. I woke up as the driver took a left onto the street. As we were 90 minutes before check-in, we stowed our bags and headed across the street to The Wellington Pub accords the street from the Union Jack Club.

We were hoping to order traditional Sunday roast but they were completely sold out. We ended up with Steak and Ale pie for me, Burger for E-Koog and fish and chips for Mrs. Koog. E was in his full glory watching the F1 race eating a large burger and giant platter of chips. He also ate the remainder of my steak pie and mash. Poor B-Koog slept with his head on the table for the entire 90 mins at the pub. I kinda thought he was dead but he finally started to stir when we got up to leave. We were happy because death would have been a tough way to start the vacation.

Finally grabbed our bags and checked into our room at the Union Jack Club. This is private armed forces hotel (think private membership kind of hotel but not as high end) that is quite lovely and the room we have has a bunk bed room for the boys and a full size bed for Me and Mrs. Koog. As most of you know the heat in London last week was record breaking. Since the whole of the UK is typically not a steam bath, most hotels do not have AC and ours was no exception. When we opened the door it was like walking into a pizza oven. Luckily, we were able to open the windows.

Mrs. Koog was smart enough to bring 2 rechargeable fans with us so we had those to at least circulate the air. We all took a nap for a few hours in as few clothes as appropriate for sharing a room with ones teenage children. E was un-wake-able when we wanted to head out to explore, so it was me, the Mrs and B hitting the town. We walked through a lovely pedestrian area with shops and restaurants that had a cornucopia of food scents and ethnicities. It was really cool to see all the varieties and how packed each restaurant was with al fresco diners. Then we headed across the Waterloo bridge and back, then onto Southbank to take a look at the skateboard park and Festival Pier. On our way back, Mrs. Koog and I had pints of cider at a hole in the wall pub showing World Cup. B-Koog looked at us with disapproving judgement as we sipped our alcoholic beverages. We enjoyed the cider and ignored the teenager.

At this point, it was 11pm and we were knackered as the Brits would say. As a matter of fact, I looked so “knackered” earlier in the day that the owner of the Wellington asked if I was ok. I must have had the 1000 yard stare with glassy eyes. I was ok then, at this point of the night not so much. We got back to the room to find a loudly snoring E-Koog who did not move a bit as we walked into our room. The combination of the cool London air and the tiny fans made the room pretty comfortable. I think we were asleep within seconds. Tomorrow…we hit Camden town and a canal boat ride.

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